Comedy World: The Movie/Transcript

[The "Mouth Productions" logo blasts on the screen]

Announcer: An official Mouth Productions film! [then, the Chatterbox Productions and GoAnimate Pictures logos also come up]

Announcer: Associated with Chatterbox Productions and GoAnimate Pictures.

[The screen fades to black. Some opening credits show on the screen, such as the writers and such. Large orange texts spell out, "MOUTH PRODUCTIONS, CHATTERBOX PRODUCTIONS, AND GOANIMATE PICTURES PROUDLY PRESENTS YOU... COMEDY WORLD: THE MOVIE"]

[The screen is black and then it shows a stage spotlight]

Eric: [clears throat] Attention fellow viewers. No cartoon characters were harmed during the filming of this movie. Any problems? Put your hands on your head, stay very calm, screech like a chimpanzee, run to your local shoe store, and ask for a triple-decker sardine marshmallow ice-cream fudge cheeseburger with a decorated olive and sprinkles on top. Thank you. [he walks offstage and the spotlight turns off]

[A shot of a wide sweeping shot of a mountain with snow on top of it is shown while happy-go-lucky music is playing in the background. The yellow sun is high in the sky and is shining bright]

Narrator: Ah, the early beautiful morning of Lakeside City. Why, it's such a beautiful, magnificent, but so... odd... city to visit.

[the camera submerges to a green hill with a sign that has red letters. It spells out, "WELCOME TO LAKESIDE CITY! Since 1868". Butterflies and birds are seen flying by]

Narrator: Ah, if only if you could feel the cold morning breeze in the air. As a narrator, I'm a lucky son of a gun. [the camera submerges to Lakeside City Elementary] Well, our huge exciting tale begins at Lakeside Elementary. [it cuts to the inside of a classroom. Eric and his other classmates are taking an exam] Ah, what is this? Pop quiz fever?

Eric: I'm ruined! And ruined is right. [He slams his head on his desk. He moans faintfully]

Mrs. White: You have eight more minutes class.

Eric: [he answers question 11 in a hurry, and rapidly scribbles. Suddenly, he notices a TNT on his back] No wonder I'm ticking.

Mrs. White: Seven more minutes.

Eric: [he answers question 12]

Mrs. White: Make that a six.

[Eric answers 13 slowly]

Mrs. White: Five.

Eric: NO! Seventeen more problems left. What do I do? WHAT CAN I DO!?

Narrator: Too much thinking later.

Eric: [he solves problem question 17] Almost there...

Mrs. White: TIME'S UP! Check your exams - front and back. Hurry up and turn it in; I don't got all day!

Eric: OH NO!!! [he explodes. We hear an alarm clock ringing]

Eric: Huh? Oh. I'm alive. [he stops the alarm from ringing] It was all a dream. Whoopee!

PC Guy: [still in his pajamas. He yawns] Good morning, Eric! Made some pancakes.

Eric: Mmm, my favorite. You put syrup in it?

PC Guy: Duh! I didn't wake up on the wrong side of the bed this time, y'know. I only waked up because I couldn't stand the taste of my own breath.

Eric: [he proceeds to walk down to the kitchen] I know today is going to be wonderful! [The scene cuts to the downstairs kitchen]

Eric: These pancakes remind me of grandma. [he pokes his breakfast with a fork] I sure do miss her.

PC Guy: Me, too, bro. Wish we could send her some postcards.

Eric: Yeah. Hey, I wonder what could go wrong today.

PC Guy: It better not be a zombie invasion, or I'll puke.

Narrator: Meanwhile, far, far away...

[the scene cuts to the outside of an abandoned lair. It cuts to the inside. We see a mysterious doctor writing out plans]

Dr. Knows-a-Lot: I, Professor Knows-a-Lot, will put an end to cartoons... WITH THIS GIANT ERASER! [humorously, he stares at the audience] Yeah. I'm talking to this fellow audience. You know who you are, my lovely people watching this film right now.

[It cuts to Lakeside Elementary. The bell is ringing, and we see many students entering the district. Eric and PC Guy are in the hallway]

PC Guy: Do the students really need to make out behind the lockers right now? This isn't a love fest, for corn sake. [a large bully walks behind Eric]

Eric: Hello sir or madam, or... [he gulps loud] Uh oh. IT'S DALLAS, THE SCHOOL BULLY! [he tries to run for his life, but Dallas grabs and squeezes his arm]

Dallas: [he throws Eric into the girls restroom] Sissy! Only nerds like YOU wear that red hoodie. [we hear girls screaming and wild punches]

Eric: That was worth it. [he collapses; the screen fades to black. Meanwhile, it cuts to Eric waking up in the nurse's office] Huh? W-where am I?

PC Guy: You were thrown into the girls' restroom by Dallas and you got beat bad by wild chicks in there.

Eric: Hey, don't be a ladies men right now.

PC Guy: [nervously] Uhh, sorry. [starts pushing Eric] Come on now, we have social studies. They are passing out our tests from last week.

Eric: I hope I beat every student in the room. [they walk out of the nurse's room. The scene switches to a classroom]

Mr. Murphy: Here is your pop quiz, Eric. [he provides him his social studies test with a grade written on it]

Eric: Thanks, genius. Weren't you the one that made out with our counselor last month? Word is going on about you. [he looks at the quiz] AN F! B-but... It can't be. [Mr. Murphy slams a pink slip on his desk] '''YOWCH! A DETENTION AGAIN! '''[the scene fades to the inside of the evil lair]

Dr. Knows-a-Lot: In about seven days, this eraser will completely erase the cartoon world permanently. The only survivor will be ME! I mean, this is MY idea. [rubs hands and smirks] Ohh, this is going to turn out so great. Only a fool with a low IQ will stop me! Besides, I have other gadgets. [the scene switches to Eric and PC Guy in class again]

Mr. Murphy: Eric and PC Guy, the principal would like to see you this instant. [PC Guy gulps. It cuts to him and Eric sitting in a detention room]

Eric: My butt feels numb.

Ms. Rowley: Shush it, Eric.

PC Guy: So are mine.

Ms. Rowley: You two. Be quiet.

PC Guy: Why am I in detention in the first place? I didn't do anything, enough said!

Ms. Rowley: Because you are always on Eric's side.

PC Guy: I have another question to ask. It's more like a complaint. Why in the holy mother of goodness did you buy these uncomfortable chairs? They feel like a damn toilet lid!

Ms. Rowley: Did you just say "damn"?

PC Guy: Well, what did you expect?

Ms. Rowley: Two hour detention.

PC Guy: But...

Ms. Rowley: Three. [PC Guy grunts]

Narrator: Thirty minutes later.

Ms. Rowley: You're free to go now, Eric. [Eric runs out of the office, which follows a 10-second silence]

PC Guy: Can I go pee?

Ms. Rowley: No.

PC Guy: Please, ma'am? [he holds his crutch and starts grunting] I'm about to do it in my pants.

Ms. Rowley: I already told you "no", you insolent fool.

Narrator: So many minutes later that the old narrator got tired of waiting, and they had to hire a new one.

PC Guy: Ma'am, I just wet myself.

Ms. Rowley: Well, why didn't you go to the bloody bathroom then?

PC Guy: As usual, you turned grouchy and said I couldn't.

Ms. Rowley: How DARE YOU question me, young man! This detention will last until the end of the day, AND THAT'S FINAL! Do you understand?!

PC Guy: Yes, ma'am. [sighs. It shows a school bell ringing]

Eric: Dad, I know that you just realized I got a detention. Which is something you don't care about.

Paul: Oh, yes I do care. This is your 50th detention you've gotten this month.

Eric: [sighs in a very exhausted way] Can I just do my homework? Pretty please? With a cherry and pretty little sprinkles on top?

Paul: Fine. I'm letting you have a chance this time. [Eric walks upstairs to his bedroom. PC Guy walks into the living room] What's up with you?

Eric: [it cuts to Eric dropping his heavy backpack on the floor and pulls his homework out of his pocket] Reading logs, eh? This is easy as pie! [he writes on the paper] Done! Time to catch up on TV shows. [he switches to Channel 12 News] I wonder what's on the news. It better not be any boring stuff.

Sally Acorn: [it zooms into a news broadcast room] This is Sally Acorn from Channel 12 News speaking here, and I'm presenting you a report.

PC Guy: [he walks into the bedroom] Well, you don't say.

Sally Acorn: An overweight professor that eats Pizza Hut all day far, far away is threatening to end cartoons. Cartoons like us. It's true! [it shows a picture of the eraser] Unfortunately, he has an eraser in space that will hit Earth in... seven days. You have ONE good week to kiss your world goodbye. Who will stop him? Who will save the day? WHO!? [she starts to tear up]

PC Guy: OH NO! [he shakes Eric] Eric, we gotta stop that eraser! We only have a week to defeat the evil professor and stop the giant eraser from hitting our only universe to live on!

Eric: You are right. We have to form a gang. But we need some backup.

PC Guy: Our friends, for crying out loud! We have family members panicking this instant.

Sally Acorn: This is Sally Acorn reporting you live from... [cries again] Channel 12 News... MOM, IF YOU ARE WATCHING THIS, I LOVE YOU, EVEN THOUGH YOU CAN BE SUCH A MUG SOMETIMES! [PC Guy grabs the television remote and switches it off]

PC Guy: Eric, we have to pack our stuff right now. We're going to get all our friends together and tell our parents we're going on this quest.

Eric: [sobs] I'M GOING TO MISS GRANDMA SO MUCH!

PC Guy: Me, too. [tries to comfort Eric] I'll start packing my, and your, stuff.

Eric: OK. If you need me, I'll be in this corner, crying my eyes out.

Narrator: Fifteen minutes later.

PC Guy: Done. I'm wearing my lucky underwear, too. [it shows a picture of dirty underwear. The tag has Eric's name crossed out]

Eric: Really? Anyways, let's tell mom and dad first. [they run down to the living room]

Susan: Why do you have those bags? Are my babies moving out this early?

PC Guy: No, I wouldn't ever do that. But I need to tell you something important.

Susan: Tell us.

PC Guy: A massive eraser is going to hit Earth in a week and we might kiss the universe goodbye. We're going to stop the professor that started this. [Paul starts crying] What's wrong, pop?

Paul: Me and mom wishes you very good luck out there. [Eric and PC Guy jump onto the purple sofa and hug their mom and dad, smiling and trying hard not to cry] We love you.

Susan and Paul: We love you, too.

Eric: But don't worry. We'll gather our friends, also. We'll stick together. [they start to leave and open the door] Take care. We both love you dearly. [they close it]

Susan: [sobs] MY DARLINGS!

Paul: Stop letting the water works flow. At least we're close... [adult humorously, he points to Susan's chest] ...here.

Susan: Don't touch my pillows, you sicko!

Paul: I really can't help it sometimes.

[the scene cuts to Eric, PC Guy, and their friends on a hill]

Eric: Well, guys, you got everything packed?

The Group: Yeah!

Eric: There's no turning back as of now. We have to defeat that professor.

David: Come on, we need to get going. Let's not make a sad scene like in every movie.

Eric: Fine. [the group walks into the sunset. The screen fades to black and it shows the group camping]

Dallas: I may be the school bully, but for the heck of it, I joined you guys.

Eric: Guess so. [he eats some stew and roasts marshmallows]

Kimberly: How long will this adventure take?

PC Guy: I got a GPS, let me check. [he looks at it] Five days away, 'hoo boy. [Kimberly gulps] But it shouldn't be that bad.

Eric: Better not be.

David: [yawns] I'm hitting the hay. [he zips open the tent, heads for bed, and flickers the light off.]

Joey: Yeah, so am I. [he goes into his sleeping bag] See ya, peeps. [we view the screen fading to black. David hears a rattlesnake hissing and mysterious growling]

David: [he gets up] What was that!?

Joey: I don't know. It sounded like a snake. Don't be such a wuss. You can't leave a good man down.

David: Shut up, you spoiled kid. [he grabs a stick to protect himself] Help me out, will ya?

Joey: Don't make a big deal over a darn reptile, for Pete's sake. Jeez, Louise.

David: [he hears the hissing again, and he sees a snake near him] YAH! [he jumps onto Joey's arms and proceeds to kick the rattlesnake away] it's gonna choke me to death! It's gonna choke me to death! OH MAMA, I WISH YOU WERE HERE RIGHT NOW! [he cries]

Joey: [throws Joey off his arms] Aww, little pansy afraid of a little reptile? Come on and hit your growth spurt already, you fool! It's not a big deal, really. You're stronger than that animal.

David: Why do you have to be so grouchy about it? What makes us human is that we all have a huge fear.

Joey: I think you should hit puberty already, you weirdo. All you do is moan and-

PC Guy: Will you guys shut up already? We're trying to get sleep here, ever heard of it?

Joey: Duh.

PC Guy: [hears the growling again] Uh oh, there it went again. [hears bushes] Who's there? [turns on a flashlight, but realizes it's out of battery] We're screwed. [Kimberly and Eric wake up]

Kimberly: I DON'T WANNA GET MY ORGANS EATEN BY A BEAR!

PC Guy:  'Know what? I'm handling this.

Eric: PC Guy, NOOO!!

PC Guy: Don't worry. [cracks knuckles hard] I got a black belt in karate.

Eric: Then how come I don't see you doing it? [scratches head]

PC Guy: I do it in a "private room" to avoid maximum embarrassment. I don't want you trending it on the Internet! Anyways, let me take care of this slow, fat brown bear. He can't do stuff. [he goes behind a couple of trees] Hey there, you honey-loving- [we hear a neck crack] WAIT, NO! [a grizzly bear can be heard growling. Off-screen, the bear begins to violently maul the screaming PC Guy as Eric watches in fear]

Eric: Ouch! Wow man, are you OK?

PC Guy: [now battered and bruised] Does it look like it? What do you think? No!

Eric: The only way to protect yourself from that bear, also known as Smokey, is to cross your fingers. Which is why mine are taped at this moment.

PC Guy: Are you stable minded? My fingers are injured real bad. My darn fingers won't save me from that horrible monster! I'M RUNNING FOR THE HILLS!

The group: NO!!

[the bear continues mauling PC Guy]

PC Guy: I think... my lenses are broken...

Eric: You should've listened to me, first thing's first.

PC Guy: I'm limping to my tent, then. [Smokey resumes mauling him] I think my tooth is chipped.

Joey: Dress up like an Elvis impersonator. I'm sure he won't disguise you.

PC Guy: No way, Jose. We're barely near a clothing store, are you nuts? [he proceeds to sprint, but Smokey stops him and continues mauling PC Guy]

Eric: I'll just tape your fingers.

PC Guy: [tries crossing his fingers] Ow. Ow. Ow. These babies are so sore. there, now tape them. [Eric does so. Smokey comes up and is ready to maul him, but realizes his fingers are crossed. He sniffs PC Guy and does a threatening claw at him and crawls away from the scene]

Eric: That was a CLOSE one. That would've cost ya a trip to the emergency room.

PC Guy: Yeah, I'm glad I didn't get KILLED by that horrendous, ugly monster. [his stomach starts grumbling] A quick snack should work. [he notices the sun rising and covers his eyes] Whoa... IT'S BEAUTIFUL! Mom never made us stay up this late. [he sees a beehive on a tree branch] I know what I'm having for my first meal.

Dallas: Uhh, dork, I wouldn't do that if I were YOU.

PC Guy: Maybe if you shut that trap of yours, you wouldn't scare the bloody bees off. Okay, let's see. [he jams his hand into the beehive hole and grabs a handful amount of honey] That oughta do the trick. [a swarm of bees come out of their habitat] Heh heh, what brings you fellas here on this gorgeous morning? [it cuts to a chase scene of PC Guy getting chased by bees] NOT THE BEES!! NOT THE BEES!! AAAAAHH!! [we hear an audience laugh] Hey movie director, will you cut that annoying sound effect off?

[it cuts to the gang entering a big city]

Eric: Wow, this sure is a big town. I hope there's a motel, because I'm tired of sleeping in the wilderness with fleas biting me. Let's hope we won't get lost either. Fingers crossed.

Kimberly: I wanna go to the mall! I wanna go to the mall! [squeals in excitement]

PC Guy: You're gonna have to hold your patience, action girl. [they bump into Ash Ketchum and his friends] Oh, excuse me.

Dallas: Who are you children? You look lost. Just like us.

Ash: We're no kids, we're the greatest Pokemon trainers of all time!

David: ...And what the bejeezus is a "Pokemon"?

PC Guy: Hmmm, let's see here. [flips through a certain amount of pages in a dictionary] Here it is! A Pokemon is a video game, card game, or other toy featuring certain Japanese cartoon characters. The words itself mean "pocket monster".

Dallas: Thanks for the research, bub.

Ash: [as usual, his stomach growls] I'm hungry!

Misty: Not again!

Eric: Isn't this a 'running gag'? Have you guys ever fell into this category every now and then? I think I recall watching your show before.

PC Guy: Shhh. [covers Eric's lips] You're breaking the fourth wall. Also, avoid copyright. [an audience is heard laughing again. PC Guy is irritated once more and stares at the viewers] Huh? Will you get out of here!?

Joey: I guess you can say that. [shrugs]

Brock: Some things never change.

Ash: Come on guys, let's go on a friendship quest!

PC Guy: Even though we barely know you three and just bumped into you guys, mind if we join? Like, just for a bit? Ourselves, we're on a journey, too.

Ash: OK. C'mon, Pikachu! [Misty's togepi clicks as usual, but PC Guy gets irritated and grunts. It cuts to the gang and Ash and his friends at a hill. His stomach growls again] We gotta get to that city, but... ugh, my stomach is reminding me that it's empty.

Eric: Hey, I have several food in my big ol' backpack. Sandwiches, cookies like how grandma used to make, mmm, Skittles, carrots-

Ash: He made tons of food for us!

Eric: Actually, my mother packed this.

Brock: Just as I suspected!

Misty: Let's stop talking and start eating!

Togepi: Togeprrrrriii!

PC Guy: Who is that egg-creature anyways? Getting kinda annoyed.

Misty: Their name is Togepi.

Togepi: Togi Togepriiiii!

PC Guy: [eye twitches] We get it. Now stop saying your name so many times. I don't wanna have a conversation with you at all.

Togepi: Togepi Togepriii! Togi Togi Togepriiii! [keeps repeating]

PC Guy: You know... WHAT!? THAT'S ENOUGH! YAAAAHH!! [swipes Togepi from Misty's arms and puts him/her in a bag. He runs off to go kidnap Togepi]

Ash: Wait! Come back! [to Misty] Oh no, we have to capture your Togepi fast!

Misty: Something bad might happen!

Eric: Guys, let's go. [they follow Ash. It cuts to PC Guy in the sewers]

PC Guy: [its revealed he tied up togepi in the sewers onto a brown chair] This will teach you not to mess with a kid like me. I can be insane, y'know. [walks in circles] What am I going to do with an annoying egg-monster like you?

Misty: [echo] Togepi! Where are you?

Togepi: Togiprrrri!

Eric: PC Guy, you better get out of there. I think they're calling the police.

PC Guy: [grows more crazier] Oh no, oh no. [Dangerous A begins playing] Oh wait, I know what I'll do with this Togepi. [a lightbulb shines on his head. He pushes the chair to the water and remains Togepi tied onto it. Togepi flows away] There, problems solved. [he hears police sirens] Oh, who can that be?

Officer: Get out of there! This is the police!

PC Guy: Oh man, gotta hide Togepi somewhere. [shivers] But where?

Officer: Get out of there!

PC Guy: [lightbulb shines on his head] I've got it! Togepi is still flowing. [grabs rope and catches her] I'll put her on this piece of toast, and... COOK HER!

Officer: Open NOW!

PC Guy: I've got a better idea. [gives a "special" medicine] Hey, buddy ol' pal, you hungry? Have this! [shoves medicine into Togepi's mouth and Togepi is suddenly knocked out] There. [goes up to ladder and opens sewer entrance]

Officer: Sorry! Can you turn the music volume down, please?

PC Guy: [hesitates] O...kay. Thanks. [stares at the audience] I feel like a... [donkey appears on the screen and starts braying] ...big fat jerk. I can be so insane sometimes. Didn't mean to knock out Togepi. [gets out with Togepi] Here, have your pet back.

Misty: You could've choked my baby to death!

PC Guy: Your... what? That creature is PESTERING! That friggin monster's attention is flattering, but... [sighs] Look, I'm sorry, alright? I really didn't mean that, and it's kinda difficult to tick me off. But she annoyed me quick. Handshake? Is that a deal? We cool?

Misty: [handshakes back] Deal's a deal.

Ash: Anyways, I really need some food.

Pikachu: Pikachu! [Ash and his friends surround Eric]

Eric: Hey, hey, now, don't start eating like a pack of wolves now. You're making me feel uncomfortable. Now, let me split this sandwich into pieces. Hmmm. So, split into three pieces. [he gets a knife out] One, two... [Ash and his friends now become impatient and eat almost all of Eric's food] HEY! Great, now I have to share with my big brother over here. [he points to PC Guy. He gulps]

PC Guy: I've never seen big eaters like this before. Why did you eat all of my brother's food? You guys really stuffed yourself, you know that? You guys are just going to end up with a bely-ache.

Ash: Hey, I can turn this into a Pokemon battle.

Kimberly: Hey, I may be a girl, but I can easily slap you for threatening one of my friends.

PC Guy: Eww.

Kimberly: No, I'm not saying that I love you! [nervously] Like, who would EVER date a weird boy like YOU?

Joey: Come on guys, let's just go. [the gang proceeds to walk away]

Ash: Wait! [the gang stops and turns back around]

Dallas: I thought you wanted to fight us. [cracks knuckles]

Ash: I'm sorry for all that. We've been traveling for days now, and I feel like collapsing. Anyways, I'd like to get to know you guys. What's your names? I'm Ash. Ash Ketchum.

Eric: Eric.

PC Guy: My name is PC Guy. It was nice meeting you. [he goes up to his ear] Psst. Secretly, my real name is Edward.

Dallas: The name's Dallas.

Joey: Joey.

David: David.

Kimberly: Uhh, hiii! My name is Kimberly.

PC Guy: Ash, you may be thinking, 'why did I bump into you guys'? Well, we're on a quest to defeat an evil professor. He has a giant eraser in space, aaaaaand... [checks watch] ...it's going to hit us in six days. [Ash and his pals gasp]

Eric: Don't worry guys. We got guns in here-

PC Guy: [covers Eric's mouth again] Will you put a lid on it? Censorship, gosh. Kids are watching our very first movie, you know that, right?

Eric: [sighs] Yes.

Joey: So Ash, what are your friends' names?

Ash: This one's Brock. He's real flirty. This one's Misty. She's kinda like more than a friend, you know?

PC Guy: [raises eyebrow] Yeah, I feel ya, Ashy boy.

Misty: [nervously] Ash will never really be alone cause he's got... me...

Dallas: Hey... is he your boyfriend?

Misty: HE'S NOT MY BOYFRIEND he's a boy and a friend but he's NOT my boyfriend!

PC Guy: [flirty] Y-you talking about me?

Misty: No, who are you anyways?

PC Guy: Name's PC Guy.

Dallas: Sorry, okay? We can work this out, alright? Just calm down. Ever heard the saying: You always hurt the one you love?

Misty: [nervously] Oh, you got it all wrong!

Dallas: [whispers to Eric] Two trainers are in love...

Eric: Well, we gotta get going. We'll be seeing you, Ash!

Ash: Thanks for everything!

Misty: It was nice knowing y'all!

Brock: Good luck out there. Have a great trip!

[Eric and everyone else walk off]

PC Guy: You know, that Ash kid actually seems pretty nice. But, we might see him sooner or later. I'm not sure. And... that Misty girl... uh...

Dallas: [sneaks up on him] Go on. Express your feelings.

PC Guy: YAH! [looks behind him and notices Dallas] Quit creeping up on me like that. How would you like it if I did that to you?

Eric: Yeah. Let's get back on our feet.

PC Guy: No problem. [they walk down the hill and the scene cuts to the inside of the evil lair]

Dr. Knows-a-Lot: [he looks at a computer] So, a group of tiny kids are coming to stop me, huh? Well, that will teach them a thing or two. I present myself my very own robot - The Robotic Metal Butt 3000. [we can hear an audience laughing] Hey, STOP LAUGHING AT MY OWN INVENTION! [we continue to hear a laughing sound effect] I know, I couldn't come up with a better name but- [we hear the laugh again] STOP LAUGHING AT ME, YOU NITWITS!! [he grunts as the scene cuts to the gang at a yard]

Joey: So this car is for sale? For free, right?

Man: Yes, you kids are free to take it. As long as you won't be involved in any accidents.

PC Guy: Don't worry, I'll take the wheel.

David: We gotcha covered. [he shows a thumbs-up finger and the group enters the vehicle, and so does PC Guy. PC Guy hot wires the car and the vehicle starts. They drive into a desert]

Eric: Whew, it gets hotter worse and worse.

PC Guy: The AC should do the trick. [he pushes a green button that spells out: A/C. Funkytown plays on the radio]

Eric: I hate this song. [he's about to change the radio station]

PC Guy: NO, NO!! [Sunshine, Lollipops and Rainbows play. He growls and changes the station. Carjacking in Hilltown plays] Okay, it's on!

Eric: [the brothers fight for the radio and PC Guy lets go of the wheel. The car drives recklessly and is about to get into the sea]

Kimberly: PC GUY, GRAB ONTO THE WHEEL AND BACK UP!!!

PC Guy: I'm ON IT!! [he drives off a ramp]

The Group: OH MAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNN!!!!!! [they bail out as the vehicle is dumped into the ocean. They swim to shore]

Dallas: What are we going to do now? [points his big finger at PC Guy's face] I'm going to squish you flat like a pancake, dork! [PC Guy backs away in fear]

PC Guy: Don't maul me just yet, big guy. There's a boat we can use... right... [he points to a pink speedboat] ...there! [the gang runs to it] I'll take the wheel. I swear I won't mess up BIG time.

Narrator: Much, much, much later.

Joey: [looks at watch] Oh no, it's 9 PM already! At midnight, we'll have only 5 days to get to the lair.

David: NOOO! [he hides in a blanket] I don't wanna die!

PC Guy: Look, a free candy boat. [they park their boat there and he heads to the 'free candy' bait] Oh boy!

Eric: You know what we want... a king-size Crunch!

PC Guy: No problemo. [to the old man] We all want a king-size Nestlé Crunch.

Old Man: Alright. [gives him a big, but fake chocolate bar]

PC Guy: Thank you. Okay guys, let's go- [his hand is stuck on the candy bar] Can you let go? I said let go. Please? Urgh. Why am I stuck onto you? [He tries escaping, but that's when an earthquake starts] Huh? [big eyeballs come out of the water and he screams.]

[A massive shark comes out of the ocean and roars as he does so. The shark is about to eat PC Guy but he breaks lose and jumps back into the speedboat]

Dallas: U-uh... uhhhh... D-did you g-g-get our candy? [the shark roars loud again]

Eric: STEP ON THE GAS PEDAL!!!!

PC Guy: [he drives away at top speed to get away from the shark, but the sea creature lures the group. The shark is in hot pursuit, as the entire group screams for help]

Old Man: If you're going to enjoy that candy bar, I'll enjoy eating you sorry excuse of human beings!

Eric: I guess we're all going to... JUMP FOR IT! [the whole group does so and jumps out of the speedboat and hops into a small island. The shark eats the boat, but he gets sucked into a big ocean hole. A giant sea creature eats him and dives back into the water]

PC Guy: We lost our only hope - transportation.

David: There has got to be a "hidden road" somewhere. [sniffs the sand for evidence and crawls away]

Joey: Oh no you don't!! [chases after him]

David: YAH! [crawls faster]

PC Guy: Can you guys not...?

Joey and David: Sorry. [it cuts to Dr. Knows-a-Lot's lab]

Dr. Knows-a-Lot: Oh, so the kids trying to stop me are Eric and PC Guy. Fair enough. [gets out a photograph of Eric and PC Guy] Robo-Butt, EXTERMINATE!

Robotic Metal Butt 3000: [burns it with a flamethrower]

Dr. Knows-a-Lot: Good boy. You deserve a treat, smarty pants.

Robotic Metal Butt 3000: I salute you, Mr. Knows-a-Lot. [salutes with his pincher]

Dr. Knows-a-Lot: Thank you, my slave. [bows] I have another invention. [a giant robotic toilet with eyeballs, arms, and legs walks into the scene] His name is the Terror Toilet! And you thought it was safe to flush. [it cuts to the gang still in the island]

Joey: Uh oh. We're running out of food and water.

PC Guy: But we can't be! Oh, wait. I know a solution. [points at a puddle of water] We can drink from there.

Eric: Fine, but we're gonna have to share.

PC Guy: [squints in anger] It's you versus me. [the gang starts fighting over the water and start beating each other up]

Eric: I'm thirrrrrssssssttttttttttyyyyyyy!

PC Guy: Deal with it. It's a war for the water.

Dallas: [he's seen arm wrestling with Joey] Okay, let's see who can win this challenge, sister. Now, let's dance.

Joey: [Dallas pulls his hand with force. He tries to win the wrestling match] [whispers to himself] Come on, do what dad told you: real men stay faithful.

Dallas: [wins the battle] I beat you, fool! [gets a straw to drink the entire water puddle. He belches] Done!